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March 2018 Slice of Life Story Challenge (SOLSC).
All participants are writing about one moment, one part of their day, every day for thirty-one days.
A big thank you to Two Writing Teachers for providing this unique opportunity
for teacher-writers to share and reflect.
The March For Our Lives, the national march against gun violence, is this Saturday, March 24, 2018 here in Washington, D.C., and I know many people who are participating. (Tony and I will be headed to Costa Rica for our 30th Anniversary on that same Saturday; I am sad to miss the march and so very excited about our trip.) Many families from my school have connected about this important issue and will be walking together with their children.
There have been so many tough conversations and strong opinions shared about this topic.
One tough conversation topic is about when should we be talking about these hard issues with young children? When is it appropriate to discuss these things with our youngest learners?
There have been so many tough conversations and strong opinions shared about this topic.
One tough conversation topic is about when should we be talking about these hard issues with young children? When is it appropriate to discuss these things with our youngest learners?
I wonder if one's perspective on this correlates with how sheltered one's own life is? Who falls on the side of preparing their children, talking about potential issues, opening their eyes to the cruelness of the world? Do these families have more history of violence or disenfranchisement? I wonder, how privileged are those who believe their children don't know about violence, don't know about racism, don't know about these hard topics, and we should not dare to bring these topics up?
Or is the varied responses to this - when should we be talking about these hard issues with young children? - more indicative of each adult's individual comfort with having these conversations? Do many simply not know how to approach or what to say, and therefore choose to avoid the discussion, deny its need?
Or is the varied responses to this - when should we be talking about these hard issues with young children? - more indicative of each adult's individual comfort with having these conversations? Do many simply not know how to approach or what to say, and therefore choose to avoid the discussion, deny its need?
In my classroom, I see preschoolers playing about real-world stuff. I hear them playing through real-world problems. I don't think children are escaping the cruelty of this world; I don't believe there is any way that they can. Example - there has been a huge uptick in gun play in my classroom these past few weeks. I believe this is precisely because of the tragedy of the school shooting in Parkland, Florida and our national conversation about guns. Just this past week, three preschoolers were "shooting" a block building that they had built. I saw the same thing after the attacks of September 11, 2001, when children built block towers and flew make-believe planes into these, toppling them to the floor. Children are like sponges, absorbing everything in the world around them - those tittering adult voices, those sad, frightened expressions on faces, that brief snippet on the car radio before a parent turns it off, the headline grabbing voice on the TV in the barber shop, the lunch counter, or car repair store. The cruel world weaves its way into their consciousness.
If your child goes to school, your child is likely to hear about these hard stories from classmates and other students. Just as in the snippet about the block play above - friends will introduce children to these topics even if families are avoiding the conversation at home, even if families have walled off their child from the news.
Our violent world is the proverbial elephant in the classroom.
What is better, to have them hear a snippet of something real and violent and frightening, and then try to process it entirely on their own, in their own head? Or to dare to speak truth in a developmentally appropriate way?
I believe the sad truth is - we must dare to talk about it now.
And whoa to the young child who has begun to read - how can they miss these stories on newspapers, magazines, TVs, computer screens?
If your child goes to school, your child is likely to hear about these hard stories from classmates and other students. Just as in the snippet about the block play above - friends will introduce children to these topics even if families are avoiding the conversation at home, even if families have walled off their child from the news.
Our violent world is the proverbial elephant in the classroom.
I don't see how it is possible to entirely shelter a child from these topics and I believe it is wrong to pretend that we can.
What is better, to have them hear a snippet of something real and violent and frightening, and then try to process it entirely on their own, in their own head? Or to dare to speak truth in a developmentally appropriate way?
We can't ignore violence.
We make a huge mistake when we avoid these hard conversations with our children.
We don't need to immerse them in the details of violent incidents, but we need children to be assured they are safe and we keep them safe. Certainly, we need to assure them that school is a very safe place. We need to honor their questions and concerns with answers, however incomplete or brief those answers might be. ("You are always safe here, I take care of you.")
Adults should intentionally cultivate opportunities for conversations about imprecise social issues, such as -
- arguments and how to have disagreements,
- how best to treat one another when we disagree,
- how to show frustration and anger in appropriate ways,
- how to join into play,
- how to be a helper,
- who is hurting? are you hurting? how to help someone who is hurting,
- what makes us feel safe? what makes us safer?
- what to do if they are scared,
- how to assert yourself when someone has something you want,
- what is fair?
- what to say or do when someone's doing something you don't like,
- how to listen to other perspectives,
- how to believe one thing strongly even while a classmate believes something else - and know that this is okay,
- how to make amends,
- how to give one another space,
-who to go to and what to do when something bad happens,
and so many more thoughtful, unending, ongoing conversations that normalize the work of living and being together. These respectful conversations will help a child feel less anxious, more able, and more hopeful. Through such conversations, we'll move from a stance of fear into one of courage.
We need to get children thinking about nonviolence. Our world needs this, now.
We make a huge mistake when we avoid these hard conversations with our children.
We don't need to immerse them in the details of violent incidents, but we need children to be assured they are safe and we keep them safe. Certainly, we need to assure them that school is a very safe place. We need to honor their questions and concerns with answers, however incomplete or brief those answers might be. ("You are always safe here, I take care of you.")
Adults should intentionally cultivate opportunities for conversations about imprecise social issues, such as -
- arguments and how to have disagreements,
- how best to treat one another when we disagree,
- how to show frustration and anger in appropriate ways,
- how to join into play,
- how to be a helper,
- who is hurting? are you hurting? how to help someone who is hurting,
- what makes us feel safe? what makes us safer?
- what to do if they are scared,
- how to assert yourself when someone has something you want,
- what is fair?
- what to say or do when someone's doing something you don't like,
- how to listen to other perspectives,
- how to believe one thing strongly even while a classmate believes something else - and know that this is okay,
- how to make amends,
- how to give one another space,
-who to go to and what to do when something bad happens,
and so many more thoughtful, unending, ongoing conversations that normalize the work of living and being together. These respectful conversations will help a child feel less anxious, more able, and more hopeful. Through such conversations, we'll move from a stance of fear into one of courage.
We need to get children thinking about nonviolence. Our world needs this, now.
I remember watching the news from the time I was seven years old, so I was accustomed to news of violent events. It was during the Vietnam War. My mother's family was extremely dysfunctional and violent, so I was exposed to that at a young age. What shocks me about parents who "protect" their children from the events of the world is that they'll expose their children to violent movies, television, video games, and music with a wink and a nod. Since the 1980s we've raised generations of kids unaware of the larger world and then expect them to get on board w/ learning about current events in high school.
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