How does vocabulary grow?

Frog* loves to talk. She has been sharing her voice with us since she was very young, making so many beautiful sounds. As she approached 18 months of age, a true vocabulary emerged. I love hearing it grow! Frog is, in many ways, a natural learner of language, listening closely to the many loving adults in her world and absorbing the words. I do a lot of narration when I play alongside her and I have noticed that Frog is becoming quite the narrator herself. 

We currently go around in circles with personal pronouns. I'll say "Do you want to me to color with you?" and she'll answer "me color you" - which leaves me slightly confused. Another favorite is when she declares, "hold you!" and she'll lift her arms towards me. (I remember my boys making this same gorgeous verbal goof!) She wants me to pick her up, and is simply echoing my ask of many times, "Would you like me to hold you?" These are common, classic errors of this developmental stage, and I have no doubt that they will straighten themselves out in time.

In high school foreign language classes, I remember how challenging I found it to take the risk of talking, to dare to share a new word. Young children do this with abandon and we have so much to learn from them. Truly, to grow a vocabulary, you have to take it for a walk - you have to use words, to grow your understanding of these new words. I have been amazed by how Frog plays with words, how she tries them out in new situations. Let me give an example or two . . . .

Frog is very interested in how things change - she notices every cabinet door that has been left open, every object that falls to the floor from the table, every item that appears out of place. She greets these new states with a surprised "Oh, no!" In recent months, she follows this exclamation of "Oh, no!" with a descriptive word about the situation. I first noticed her experimentation with the word "ripped" - as in, 'yes, the book page is ripped.' It is a shocking turn of events! Frog is learning not to rip pages in picture books, but at two years of age, she is not always able to control the impulse and she is absolutely obsessed with the fact that it has occurred. A book that had a page ripped more than three months back will have this flaw pointed out every time you read the book to her. Every. Single. Time. So, here's what has caught my ear in recent weeks - Frog has started to use the word 'ripped' for other broken things. She saw a pothole in the road on a recent walk and said - "Oh, no! Ripped!" Just thinking about this makes me smile. She is noticing the change, noticing that it isn't 'right,' or as it was, and she connected this change to the ripped page of a book.

Yes, I love this! I feel as if I am seeing her brain grow and stretch. She is applying what she knows in new ways. 

The same thing has happened with the word "leaking" - a word she LOVES now, after watching endless rain pour out of a downspout during a rainstorm, and hearing us describe this as 'leaking,' 'draining,' and 'pouring out.' She held on to the word "leaking" because she had heard it many times before in relation to her sippy cup, which I have the darndest time closing tightly, and here the word appeared again vis-a-vis the rain - imagine! She absorbed this new word. A day or two later, eating oatmeal at breakfast, she ate too quickly and some oatmeal smeared onto her chin, and she declared "Oh, no! Leaking!" Again, just thinking about this makes me smile. Isn't it fascinating that this more soft, amorphous, free flowing material was 'leaking' and the harder cracked stuff (the road) was called 'ripped' ? Yes, I think her word use is inaccurate, but it is also really close. I get it. 

It's two year old code. 
It's two year old language explosion. 
It's lots of fun for this grandmother.

Thinking about her growing vocabulary, I have been working on a very special photo album for Frog. Or is it for me? Yes, I am trying my best to document this time, and so much happens every day, I must really work to keep up. I looked through photos of Frog at play and thought about all the new words she has recently acquired, and decided to connect action photos with these words. I've started a sweet little photo book with pictures of her:

closing, opening, dumping, digging, pouring, looking, hiding, finding, messy, soft, gentle, ticklish, loud, quiet, moving, walking, running, falling, jumping, spinning, dressing, wearing, helping, washing, cleaning, sweeping, raking . . . .

Oh my, the list goes on and on, and reads like the life of a happy youngster. Which Frog is!

 

"If it's in the hand and in the body, it's in the brain."

                                                 - Bev Bos

*In order to keep as much privacy as possible for my family, I try to use nicknames. Frog is the nickname for my oldest granddaughter, who is two years old. Her younger sister was born in Fall 2020; I've nicknamed her Bird.

COVID means - What should this blog share now?

As another calendar year draws to a close, I find myself musing about this blog. I started it so many years back, when I was teaching preschool, and it was the perfect place to capture my reflections. I haven't written very much in recent months, and I should explain . . . .

This past spring, I proposed scaling back to part-time teaching, searching for that ever elusive "work-life" balance; I wanted to devote more time to writing, which, inexplicably, just calls out to me right now. I made a delightful proposal to my school for this part-time work (imagine - a maker's space for early childhood!) and my school was receptive to this idea...when...

drumroll...

this crazy pandemic usurped this possibility, and 

I found myself suddenly without a teaching job at all. 

It has taken some time to get used to this, to adjust to this new normal. 

In recent days, I have gone back to read some of my earlier posts, and I am fascinated by the details recorded. I am immediately transported back in time, surrounded by these beautiful children. I am so glad that I took time to write about these precious moments. I am reminded of that Reggio adage:

If it's not documented, it didn't happen. 

Reading through these past posts, I realize - I must keep writing this blog. Just as I have had to change my sense of purpose these past many months, I believe it is time to tweak this blog a bit. I will write from my new lens. I will write as a former and "seasoned" preschool teacher, an early childhood advocate, a passionate grandmother, a reflective mother, an engaged bystander. Although I won't have any stories from my classroom, I still have so many early childhood stories to share. Let's see where this leads me!

COVID-19: Anti-bias early childhood

 This morning, we kicked off the 2020-2021 school year's 

Anti-Bias Early Childhood Working Group, an initiative of D.C. Educators for Social Justice (DCESJ).

I am proud to be a part of this group of educators! 

Early childhood educators work to meet the needs of every child, to ensure that no child is invisible or left out of learning. Anti-bias is inherent and integral. We are working with humans, we are working with CHILDREN, we are building the future. 

This work is particularly challenging during this time of COVID-19. Virtual learning requires many new skills and so much additional planning and preparation. Teachers of young children are working with parents and caregivers in a much more intimate way than ever before, with families right at their child's hip for learning. Although technology allows us to personalize education for children, it is extremely difficult to create some of those generic and fertile preschool experiences that foster so much social thinking for young children - you know, playing together in dramatic play and struggling over who gets to play with what, creating a block tower together and learning how to respond when a classmate accidentally makes it fall over, or sharing space when painting and drawing together on a class mural. So many of these experiences feel impossible to create virtually....

...and yet, teachers are trying! Oh my! I am in awe of today's early childhood teachers!! 

The teachers I met in today's working group session have anti-bias, anti-racism, and social justice at the core of their practice, and work hard to weave these essential ideals into lessons. We spoke of ways that the working group might best support teachers during this very challenging and difficult year. We are looking for ways to share resources, especially "low prep and practical" virtual anti-bias lessons. We are sharing ideas to support teacher wellness and self-care, during such a stressful time.

Book and music choices can go a long way to introducing social justice ideas. Visual art and storytelling can provide amazing opportunities for children to wrestle with big questions. Our close and personal work with families during this time - this, too, is an asset, an opportunity to create a true community, with teachers taking time to explain the why behind certain lessons, including parents in our thinking, and seeking their support. 

COVID 19 - What is there to savor?

Here we are in the middle of week eight of shelter-in-place. I am finding that my phone calls with preschoolers and families are taking a little longer than they did those first few weeks...perhaps we are all seeking a deeper connection?

Truly, we seem to have shifted from
fearful and overwhelmed
into
acceptance tinged with sadness,
open to joy.
This is our life now.

These preschoolers - honestly, what a gift they are to the world! My prescription for sanity in this time: reach out and converse with a young child. Build that connection. Prepare for a journey somewhere magical! What do I mean? Let me share a few [anonymous] tidbits from my families' worlds:

- dragging t-ball equipment to a local school's baseball field and playing an impromptu game of baseball with your family,
- building a marble run on your wall, using cardboard rolls,
- using found objects and magnetic numerals and exploring math with Dad,
- putting on lipstick and having a fashion competition with your whole family,
- celebrating the find of insect larvae in a rotted tree stump, on a family nature walk
- building a hiding place for stuffed animals and Mom's high heels,
- whole family re-enactments of favorite picture books,
- driving to the airport (which is empty, of course) to have lunch; sitting in the bay windows, looking at airplanes and other transportation,
- building boats with your family, to float in the wading pool, and testing them in different ways.

It's obvious that families are becoming very creative, playing deeply with their kids. One preschooler was excited to tell me how they burnt a batch of chocolate chip cookies, and cut off the burnt edges, "I eat them but not the burned part, some parts are not burnt."

That beautifully describes this time of COVID-19 - it is possible to find something to savor. We must look for joy.

"some parts are not burnt"

COVID-19: What do you know how to do?

We've been asking the children,

what do you know how to do, all by yourself?

This has proven to be a very fun conversation starter. The children have a fun range of "I can do!" -

turn on the hose
I am an engineer
play mancala with Mommy
coloring
playing balls
play Legos
building Magna Tiles out of stuff
open snacks
grow plants
water plants
count to 20
paint on sprinkles and rocks
look at the funny hat I made
biking
ride my balance bike
play in sand box
commanding "SIT!" and "STAY!" and having your dog do this!
make rainbows

COVID-19: What do the parents say?

Here's what we're hearing about virtual learning:

"We love the read-alouds!"

"My child does not like the read-alouds."

"It is hard for us to commit to the once-a-week Zoom."

"Why can't we have more Zoom meetings each week?"

"Where are the academic tasks?"

"Why are there academic tasks?"

"You have sent a lot of lessons. Do we have to do them all?"

"Please, could you send more lessons? There are not enough."

"My child will not sit for more than five minutes."

"How can my child play independently, so that I may get work done?"





UGH.



This is hard.

COVID-19: What is tough?

There is so much that is
so tough
about virtual teaching.

This old gal is hoping that learning all this new technology -  group chats, FaceTime, shared google files, linking files, data entry for new schedules and spreadsheets, and so much more - will serve to prevent Alzheimer's. A girl can dream, yes?

I am drained.

Things are simultaneously

faster - instantaneous even,
think:

• talking to a child and seeing them in person!
• opening a video, and hearing your teacher talk!
• you can use the mute button and no one is interrupting!

and slower,
think:

• waiting for the other party to read your text,
• or enter their information,
• or respond to your email;
• creating videos of books and morning meetings;
• figuring out the nuances of uploading and linking files
• things that must be done in a particular order, in order to be done right (and so there's more waiting and more 'do overs' as you learn)
• it can feel as if you are repeating the same steps, over and over

and overwhelming,
think:

• so many emails in the inbox
• so many 'stakeholders' - parents, administrators, colleagues, specialists, and more
• it feels as if everything must be done at once
• how to have good collaboration in this virtual world?

and complicated,
think:

• do you need to get permission to do this?
• is it appropriate developmentally to expect this from a child?
• are we burdening the families by asking for this?
• what is most helpful right now?
• so little body language, so many fewer clues (did this written message mean what I think it meant?)
• it can feel as if you are repeating yourself, over and over

and hard,
think:
everyone is in a different emotional place, dealing with their response to this crisis; some people have family members with the disease, others know no one and feel very removed, still others know someone who is an essential worker, on the front lines...we don't know what anyone else is carrying on their shoulders...we must give grace and love to all, and, especially,
to ourselves.

Deep cleansing breath.

COVID 19 - How have things changed?

Truly,
I should be writing more in this blog, during this new normal.

My teaching days are now filled to the brim with new experiences - working through technical challenges to produce some clunky video for preschoolers, having virtual meetings with colleagues, FaceTime conversations with families and preschoolers, on and on. It's all new, and I think I am still trying to find my footing.

It feels as if the world is trying to find its footing.

So here we all are, figuring this out as we go.

Something kind of sweet though - we are building stronger connections with families. We are having rich one-on-one conversations on a regular basis, striving to be in contact at least twice a week. Each of us on the teaching team is taking turns to chat with families, and we share these stories with one another. This brings me great joy! I am particularly fond of FaceTime and the ability to see children's faces...I know it helps the preschoolers, too, to see mine (though, geez, I am shocked by how I look, every single time that camera pops on). I delight in preschooler's use of FaceTime - I have seen so many ceilings!

My friend Hannah's home routine for her preschooler

My role as teacher has changed. I find I am listener, supporter, and counselor, shoring up the family. I am touched by the confidences that have been shared - families needing to vent, to hope, to understand, seeking insight, perspective, affirmation, or just an ear. Over and over again, I am awed by the strength, wisdom, and love of all these families, how they are meeting the demands of this wild new time. We are a resilient species, we human beings.

It is perhaps not surprising that each family is succeeding a little differently from one another, no two alike. Couples are finding new work-life rhythms, these were made up on the fly and continue to be re-adjusted. Children have clear routines, no routines, and somewhere-in-the-middle routines; everyone is finding out what works best for them. I try to share what we did in school, just to let families know of what was once possible...in a very different setting.

Things are always going to be different at home.

COVID-19 How might we help parents?

What a shock to families, to be home full-time, around the clock, with your energetic preschooler! As we continue to build our virtual learning as we go, with little to no beforehand planning, I am striving to know what families need. We can change our materials to match their needs.

Our school's approach has been to offer families the same daily framework as we had in school - we are sending daily plans that more or less resemble the school day, with a morning message/intention for the day, a core lesson, a read-aloud, plus special extras such as dance and music links. Some families find that these are not enough materials; others have insisted they are too much. I, for my part, insist that families not feel obligated to do any of it - these are meant as supports for families during this new normal. Though, I continue to tweak the materials to meet the emerging needs.

There are so many resources available on the internet. The early academic information is almost daunting! There are math and alphabet games, scavenger hunts, and videos galore.

The real work is in behavior management. Families have never had to deal with their little ones day in and day out like this before! All of us, sheltering in our homes, in isolation. How do we get along?

I've reminded families - when the going gets rough, keep their outlooks small and immediate. Just get through the next little bit of time as patiently and kindly as you can.

Behavior management skills are built over time...there is no panacea. However, children thrive on routine...it is good to try to follow a similar pattern each day, and, ideally, even provide a visual for your preschooler about this routine.

One small yet effective tool we keep at the ready at school: "First/Then" This simple, direct lingo can often lead a child into more positive choices, rather than spiraling into tantrums. Basically, it goes like this - preschooler really wants to do x, whereas you really need/want them to do y. Simply say, "First y, Then x." When you use this on a regular basis, you will build your child's ability to do less-preferred activities...and they will always have the happy reward of doing something fun right afterwards.

Believe me, like every behavior idea, it doesn't always work - but it may well be worth trying.

COVID 19 - What happens when we Zoom together?

We had a very special Zoom call yesterday afternoon, initiated by one of our families. This was our first time connecting with one another through this tool. I loved seeing everyone's faces, and hearing the happy pandemonium of all the children's voices. I've been on a few Zoom calls in recent days, having needed to connect virtually with a variety of groups of people during this health crisis. I think this was the first Zoom call where there did not seem to be anyone "administering." There was no one turning off and on the various mics from afar, no one helping participants to take turns in their talking. It was a glorious free for all!

My noticings:

I loved seeing all the families together...many of the children have siblings, either younger or older, and there everyone was, together, making faces, laughing, and talking.

I thought the parents looked remarkably relaxed and happy. This new normal started back on Thursday, March 12, 2020, when the President declared a national emergency and schools were closed that very next day. Relaxed and happy, on your 11th day home with your children in this surprising, unforeseen way? Go, families! You rock!!

I heard so many caring expressions from the children -

• "I want to hear ____ talk; isn't it ____'s turn?" said one preschooler; 
• Another showed a page from their new journal and a classmate responded, "I like that!!"
• "How about I try to talk to everybody?" one preschooler asked, diplomatically.

There was so much love and affection between all the kids and their families - sitting on laps, sharing snacks, stretching and moving while being held by a loving parent, squeezing closely together...so dear!

There were a series of unexpected and absurd conversation topics -

• why do people kill alligators and crocodiles?
• these are the lovies I sleep with at night.
• do you know Darth Vader?

All the children had things to share: Legos, costumes (lots of princess dresses!), journals, drawings, paintings, and stories. There was an impromptu book sharing, with preschoolers leaving their video feed to search their homes for favorite stories, to show these to their classmates. So cute! They see themselves as readers, wanting to learn more about everything.

We were so charmed by this exuberant time together, we are thinking that weekly "Zoom gatherings" would be a fun routine to add to this new normal. More to come!

COVID - 19: How to explain to kids?

I made a short video for my students, to explain this coronavirus pandemic in terms that they might understand. I have long admired Fred Rogers' advice:

If it’s mentionable, it’s manageable. 

If we talk about tough issues, we can handle them; we’re not as scared. I believe it is really important to convey this courage to children, to let them know that we are here for them, we are keeping them safe. Here's the text of my video:

I want to talk to you about something that is on everybody’s minds these days.
 You’re probably wondering why we’re all at home, why we friends can’t be together in the same classroom, playing together.
 Maybe you’ve heard this big word:
 Coronavirus.
 Maybe you’ve wondered about it.
 Coronavirus.
 Would you clap it with me?
 [Clap out the syllables of Coronavirus]
 See it’s not too big. We’ve got this!
 It’s a big, big word with FIVE syllables – yet, here’s something surprising, Coronavirus is very, very, very small. You and I can’t see it. It’s practically invisible – unless you have a very strong microscope.
 Coronavirus is a very powerful germ that can make people sick. And, because we can’t really see it, we’re not always sure where it is.
 I don’t know a lot about it, but I know there are lots of scientists, lots of adults, who are working very hard to keep us safe from Coronavirus. Lots of people all around the world are thinking about this, working on it. We are in a whole big community of people asking questions about this.
 And we know how to stop it!
Oh, yes, we do!
We have good ideas about not spreading this virus.
n  need to wash our hands thoroughly - you can sing along while you wash your hands, a song makes the soap bubbles last longer, as you clean your hands all over.
n  You can be sure to cover a cough or sneeze with your elbow
n  If you hear someone cough or sneeze, you can move away from them, give them a little space...maybe go get the box of tissues for them
n  And, we have to spend time apart. That’s why school is closed.
 If we can spend time apart, we won’t pass Coronavirus to others, and we won’t grow it, in our world. That is a very kind thing!
 It’s pretty strange to not be in our classroom together,
But,
Here’s the good news:
We get to be with our families during this time.
There’s lots of things to do at home, too!
And we get to be resourceful.
 We need to see each other through the computer, through pictures. We can talk on the phone together, too.
 We have always been thinkers.. We can think of fun and interesting things to do at home:
 Building.
Drawing.
Writing.
Tell stories!
 You could also think like a scientist. What do you think we could do to make Coronavirus go away faster? What if you get out some paper and give it a think, draw and write what you imagine. I wonder what it looks like! What magic can you create that makes this virus go away, stop making people so sick.?
 Also, what is something kind that you can do? What is something you can do to help your family? Show your family what the we do every day!
 We’re still going to have lots of fun together, just like we always do. For a while, we need to be together separately!
 We can share our fun ideas with each other, too. Send me a picture of what your are building, what you are drawing. Tell me a story when I call you on the phone. We’re going to make this time apart be a time when we are still together in our hearts.
   If you start to feel worried or frustrated about it, remember the rule of three – Three Deep Cleansing Breaths! Let’s do that now.

[Take three deep breaths together.]

 I care about you.
  

COVID 19 - What should kids reflect on?

We plan to make frequent phonecalls to the children, sharing the responsibility for these amongst the team. What should we talk to the children about? What should we get them thinking about? Our school routine of "Question of the Day" was such a big hit ... is there a way to make this happen, virtually?

We've suggested that each preschooler have a journal. Wouldn't it have been great if we could have created these for the students before this time apart began?

We've begun a list of ideas for children to reflect, draw, and write about, during this pandemic:

• What is something kind you have done? 
• How are you helping your family?
• What do you plan to do today?
• Tell me a story.
• What is the most fun activity you have done with your family?
• Do you miss school? What are you missing about it?
• Have you been outside? Have you noticed any signs of spring? What have you noticed?
• Are there shapes in your home? What is a rectangle in your home?
• What is different about home than school?
• Do you have centers at home? How might you create these at home?
• Do you have a calm-down place? Where is it? What does it look like?

 Creating community virtually - that's our challenge.

COVID 19: Virtual Learning

Just like that,
we will not meet in our classroom,
but virtually only,
preschoolers and teachers,
for the foreseeable future,
while our world struggles against coronavirus.
To be apart
is the very best defense.

Just like that,
we are thinking virtually,
how to display our learning?
how to have conferences?
how to do lessons?
how to create projects?
how to play together separately?
how to build and paint and dress up and move and read and share together?
how to do this virtually?

Oh my.

This is a reinvention of preschool.

Do you see an airplane?

I love large cardboard boxes. Preschoolers delight in them, too. This past fall, someone donated one to our class and it became our bear cave - with a simple half-circle opening cut into one side. The box fit four preschoolers comfortably, and this became our respected limit. The box became another way to do that important social emotional work of taking turns. Plus, it was the best place to read a book or share a story with friends.

After awhile, it was time for a change. It was January, and that old cave was looking plenty ragged after our holiday break. What else might it be? There was a lot more conversation and play about  "cars, trucks, and things that go." I bet I could turn that box into an airplane! So I did. I cut another half-circle opening on the other side  - thinking it would be helpful for children to enter the plane from both sides. With a little help from another box or two, I created a 'nose' (not sure that's the technical word) and some large flat wings and even some tail wings, though these were particularly flimsy and inclined to break. Ah, the fun the children had! We maintained our cap of four children only, for the main body of the plane, but there was now room for a fifth, a pilot, in the front. 

(I still laugh out loud when I remember J sticking her head out of the body of the airplane, holding a map in her hands, and yelling at E in the pilot's seat - "Hey, pilot, this is where we are going!")

We played in that airplane for six fun weeks, and we worked that box hard. There were many repairs made, lots of tape re-employed. When I got into the classroom yesterday morning, I looked at the dilapidated remains and thought, oh my, this plane has got to go. 

I carted it out onto the playground for one last romp before the dumpster. I set it up for the children to see as they came down the steps - I just knew that they'd squeal with glee! This would be the farewell tour.

We'll find another box, create another design goal, later.

Bittersweet for me - 

my beloved maintenance man,

who helps me and everyone on staff with every possible need that we have, always going the extra mile, a true gem for our school,

he watched me carry that box out of the school and down the steps to the playground,

and I guess he thought I was heading TOWARDS the dumpster...that I was trying to save him a few steps.

When the children raced onto the playground, there were no happy laughs of surprise - they just raced about and played. Only I knew 

the plane was gone.

It had already been thrown away.

Here's the reality of teaching -

there are so many adults "in the soup" of it! We are all working hard, alongside one another, with our own duties and concerns, often overlapping and intertwining.

We do the best we can.

We assume good intentions.

There'll be another box.

Can we talk together?

This magic moment:

It is indoor recess and they play together, building with our large, foam, 'blue blocks.' They construct a simple structure with a long bench, which promptly becomes a shared bench for conversation. They pretend to be Momma and Daddy, and talk about taking care of the baby and the dog. One preschooler does all the talking, because, honestly, the other is developmentally delayed in speaking. What makes this first preschooler persist in the conversation? She has a sixth sense for her partner's delight and interest in the game, and a huge empathic heart that is not in the least bit stopped by lack of speech. It is beautiful to watch.

We adults have much to learn from children.

Magic.

Why teach about Black Lives Matter to preschoolers?

I am posed this question a lot.

Some have challenged me, saying that Black Lives Matter is inappropriate for preschoolers. When I begin to explain the work that I do, others have said - "oh, you are just watering it down. That's not Black Lives Matter. That's 'all lives matter.'"

Here's the thing:

What do we hope for high schoolers when they graduate, regarding mathematics? Don't we hope that they will be very strong in math, that they will be able to wrestle with concepts in algebra, trigonometry, calculus, and more? What about their literacy skills - aren't we hoping to create fervent readers? Aren't we hoping to create strong writers? Aren't we hoping that they can compose their thoughts into intelligible arguments, to be able to give bold speeches, to stand up for themselves, and to defend principles?

I do not ever speak of algebra or calculus in my preschool class. I do not ever speak about literary classics. However, I offer strong mathematical and literacy opportunities at the preschool level, laying the foundation for more challenging skills as they advance through their schooling.

Black Lives Matter can be treated similarly.

What are the skills that we want to foster in our young children so that they might be able to advocate for all? How do we lay the groundwork so that they are fortified to create a softer, kinder, inclusive world where all are supported and nurtured?

It is not okay to postpone or avoid this teaching. It begins now.

What about skin color?

Scene:
Two young children, preschoolers, playing in our dramatic play center, which is all about travel these days. We have created an airplane out of a large cardboard box and this has been great fun. The two children are playing "Frozen." (How many years now has this movie been such a hit theme for our little ones?) I'm hanging out nearby, trying to catch their words and play, curious about what is going on.

The White preschooler, holding a large, old, broken calculator, which is kind of like an iPad if you use a little imagination, asks, "What color hair do you want?"
I think she is running some sort of salon, just outside that plane - maybe in the airport?
The Black preschooler steps out of the airplane and says, "Blue."
The White preschooler asks, "What color hair do you want, Ms. Ingram?"
I say, "I like my gray hair. I don't want to change it."
She laughs and says, "You have to have blue or white."
I say, "Well, let's go white. I'm almost there already."
The White preschooler turns back to the Black preschooler and asks, "What color skin do you want?"
The Black preschooler says, "Brown."
The White preschooler says, "No, you can't have that skin color."
I get the creepiest sensation up my neck.

Oh my.
The week of Black Lives Matter Week of Action in Schools has just ended. We had a very good, strong week, sharing developmentally appropriate activities with preschoolers. One activity I did was a reprise of something we explored at the start of the school year, as we thought about "me, myself, and I" - a focus on skin color. This week, we compared our hands with one another, noticing all the different skin tones, and how beautiful each of us was, in our own skin. We made handprints using multicultural paints, matching our skin tones to the paint that was closest. We made a sweet poem with our words, simple lines of affirmation, "I Am in This Skin."

One of my fears,
as a somewhat inept teacher,
always learning,
making mistakes,
striving,
is that I will somehow teach children a partial truth that they will hold on to and use in some ugly way.
Certainly,
we have so many examples of this in the world today.
How do I know that they truly
GET
discussions of skin color?
How do I know that they will use these as a means of accepting all our beautiful differences and basking in this as a precious and wonderful thing?
How do I know they won't find ONLY a partial truth, and forever use skin color as a horrible tool, a bludgeon, of one being better than the other (as so many have done throughout time)?
Ugh.

To repeat...
The White preschooler turns back to the Black preschooler and asks, "What color skin do you want?"
The Black preschooler says, "Brown."
The White preschooler says, "No, you can't have that skin color."
I get the creepiest sensation up my neck.
I ask, "Wait - what?"
The White preschooler clarifies, "You can't have that skin color for Elsa."
All my fears jump out into my frontal cortex and I am in a heightened state of anxiety and I interrupt the play -
I say, "I am uncomfortable with this. Our skin colors come with us at our birth, they are so lovely and beautiful, each and every one. We don't get to change our skin colors. I don't like that you are asking this."
There.
Ha!
I am teaching the right way! Right?

The Black preschooler says, "Ms. Ingram, we are just playing!"
The White preschooler says, "Yeah, this is just a game!"

Oh my.

There I go again,
putting an adult lens on
children's play.

Ridiculous, I am.

Uncomfortable, I am.