Sunday, March 26, 2017

sol17-26 Why did I make room for that in my head?




I am participating in the
Slice of Life Story Challenge (SOLSC).
All participants are writing about one moment, one part of their day, every day of March 2017. 
A big thank you to Two Writing Teachers for providing this unique opportunity
for teacher-writers to share and reflect.


I am really thankful for this year's writing challenge - it seems to have catapulted me out of my writer's block. Although I have sliced with Two Writing Teachers for six years, by this fall I was rarely participating in the weekly slicing. I was not quite sure what to write. My blog had more or less come to a standstill. 

Why did I start having trouble writing posts? 

Awhile ago, an administrator asked me not to publicize my blog with families of my students. Mind you, I began writing this blog about early childhood long before I began working at my current school and, over the years, the families of my students were an ideal place to find readers, leading into conversations about real issues in early childhood. This administrator challenged me about the blog's existence, saying that this blog was not sanctioned by the school and did not represent the school, and that I should be very, very careful about what I write. 

It is true - this is my blog, filled with my thoughts, ideas, opinions, reflections, questions. It is entirely mine. It is not a school blog. It is my outlet, my writing, my pastime.

I don't agree with or understand this administrator's perspective. Why not embrace and welcome teachers to write, think, reflect outside the classroom? 

I took extra steps to make my posts more anonymous. I no longer share with families or colleagues that I write a blog. I went quiet. For awhile, this worked fine - I wrote. Then I started writing less. And less. And less. Even without agreeing to this administrator's perspective, I made space for it in my head. Doubt crept in. I began to question -  

should I be writing?
is there any value?
what is my point?

There you have it -
a negative voice,
leading to
a boundary,
a wall,
a block,
a boulder,
stopping much of my writing,
leaving me
stuck,
blank,
empty.


Then along comes the March writing challenge! The reality of saying yes to this writing challenge: I don't get to wallow, I don't get to be blocked, I simply must write.

All my questions have fallen to the wayside. Now I am wondering, why did I make room for that negative voice in my head? There will always be plenty to write about.



I hope I can hold on to this writing habit after the challenge. 

14 comments:

  1. that's frustrating to endure. i hope you keep writing !

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  2. WOW! What a terrible thing for an admin to say. I have mine linked to my school website and email and I've never given it a second thought.

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    1. Kudos to your school and its website and its support of you! Schools should desire "teacher-writers."

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  3. I've heard things like this happen to other Slicers. It is demoralizing. However, sometimes the redirection forces us to look at our life through a different lens.

    Glad you've come back this March, Maureen. I hope you'll join us on Tuesdays again!

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    1. Yes! It is exhilarating to know I still have plenty to write about, even with redirection. Thanks! I am planning to join in on Tuesdays, again!

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  4. I don't think there are more than 2 or 3 people in my regular life that know about my blog. In our whole school board there was a blanket rule set out a few years ago that we can only blog through certain board supported site. It's complicated to use so I have never bothered. I like to keep my writing life private.

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    1. Thanks! I think this is something I have learned - even if my writing is private, I'm having a grand time.

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  5. First of all, I think your posts are always informative and teach me about how preschool works. I've never found anything that might make me uncomfortable. When I taught, I had different parents comment and/or tell me that they enjoyed what I wrote. Of course, for the SOLC, I also wrote with my students, so it could hardly be a secret. It also seemed to help sometimes for parents to read when I wrote about why something was happening and the learning that came from it. Keep on writing!

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    1. Yes, this is what took me aback. I feel that I work very hard to write positively, to never denigrate, to be informative. I am still sad and surprised about the pushback.

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  6. Good for you for persevering! I hope #SOL17 will inspire you to keep writing.

    https://wordsmithing2017.wordpress.com/2017/03/26/a-six-word-memoir-with-an-esoteric-slant/

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  7. I'm glad you're back. I was worried when you disappeared, because the last time you disappeared it was because your son was sick. I still enjoy peeking in your classroom, even though mine are on to the next :). It's too bad that other parents won't get the same peek. There's a lot to learn here.

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    Replies
    1. Thanks! I do love this writing. I'm glad you enjoy looking back ;-)

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